Weight Loss and Gain: Shedding Pounds, Easing Pain

What They Don’t Tell You When You Lose Weight: My Journey from 360 to 180

Losing weight is often portrayed as a miraculous transformation, and in many ways, it truly is. At my heaviest, I was nearly 360 pounds. In just two years, I’ve shed almost half of that, and now I’m at 180. You might imagine that this transformation would feel euphoric all the time—and yes, much of the journey has been wonderful. I’m incredibly proud of myself, and for the first time in years, I feel a deep, genuine happiness.

I’ve not only lost the physical weight, but I’ve also let go of a lot of emotional baggage that was holding me back. During that period of my life, I was in a relationship where my health concerns were largely dismissed. While that person may have meant well, I was constantly told that my weight didn’t matter. It wasn’t until I took control of my own health and stepped out of that dynamic that I realized how much was at stake.

Now, I feel lighter in every sense of the word—more energetic, more confident, and more in love with life. This transformation has improved my physical health, but it’s also had a profound impact on my mental and emotional well-being. I wake up every day excited about life, ready to face whatever challenges come my way, and I’ve come to truly appreciate the value of self-care and self-love.

But with all the positives, there were some things about losing weight that I wasn’t prepared for—things that no one really talks about.

1. Your Relationship with Food Will Never Be the Same

Food was once my comfort, escape, reward, and punishment all rolled into one. During my weight loss journey, I had to completely rewire my relationship with food. What used to bring me temporary happiness became something I needed to scrutinize with every bite, focusing on its impact on my health. This shift wasn’t easy—food, which had always been a source of comfort, started to feel like a source of anxiety at times. Learning to stop using food as a crutch and instead view it as fuel was a challenging mental adjustment. It created a complicated relationship with eating, where I often found myself overthinking every meal and navigating the emotions that came with it.

2. You Mourn the Person You Were

While I’m proud of my new, healthier self, there’s an unexpected sense of loss for the person I used to be. Being the "big guy" was a part of my identity, and even though it wasn’t serving me physically or emotionally, letting go of that identity has been more complex than I anticipated. My size, though unhealthy, acted as a shield, and losing it feels like saying goodbye to a version of myself. Transformation is more than just physical; it involves an emotional and mental shift as well. In many ways, you’re grieving who you were while learning to embrace who you’ve become.

3. Your Skin Doesn’t Just Bounce Back

One of the most surprising realities of losing so much weight was that my skin didn’t shrink back with me. Loose skin wasn’t something I’d considered when I imagined the “perfect” body at the end of this journey. After shedding almost 200 pounds, my skin didn’t just snap back into place—it remains as a reminder of where I’ve been. While I’ve come to terms with it and made peace with the changes, it took time to adjust to this new version of myself and accept that my body will always carry some signs of my past, no matter how far I’ve come.

4. The Way People Treat You Changes

One of the most surprising parts of my weight loss journey has been how differently people treat me now that I’m thinner. Strangers are more open, compliments come more easily, and people pay attention in ways they never did before. While that validation can feel good at first, it’s also disorienting. It made me question: Why wasn’t I worthy of the same kindness and attention when I was heavier? The shift in how people interact with you can be eye-opening and unsettling, revealing how much society unfairly values appearance.

5. Body Dysmorphia Can Stick Around

Even at 180 pounds, there are days when I still see the 360-pound version of myself in the mirror. Body dysmorphia doesn’t just fade with the weight—it’s a mental struggle that lingers. After years of seeing myself one way, my brain is still catching up to the new reality. This process goes far beyond physical transformation; it involves reprogramming how I view myself, reminding me that the journey isn’t just about changing my body, but also reshaping my mind.

6. Happiness Isn’t Just About the Number

The most important lesson I’ve learned is that happiness doesn’t come from a number on the scale. While losing weight boosted my confidence and improved my health, real happiness came from regaining control over my life. It wasn’t just about shedding pounds—it was about breaking free from the toxic relationship and unhealthy patterns that kept me stuck in self-neglect. Now, without the weight—both literal and emotional—I feel more like myself than ever before. True happiness came from finding balance and reclaiming my sense of self.

Final Thoughts

If I could give myself one piece of advice at the start of this journey, it would be to prepare for more than just the physical transformation. The emotional and mental changes are just as significant, if not more so. While the number on the scale is part of the story, it’s far from the whole picture.

Losing weight changed my life, but it also challenged me in unexpected ways. The best part is that I didn’t just lose weight—I shed the emotional baggage that came with it and gained a deeper understanding of myself. This journey has transformed me in ways I never anticipated, and for that, I am grateful every single day.